9-4-2024 (JAKARTA) In the bustling metropolis of Jakarta, Zavaraldo Renaldy, a 28-year-old mapping surveyor, finds himself caught between the expectations of his parents and the realities of modern life. Despite his stable career and financial independence, the prospect of marriage remains elusive, as he prioritises his professional aspirations over settling down.
Renaldy’s story is a reflection of a broader trend sweeping across Indonesia, where an increasing number of individuals are delaying or forgoing marriage altogether. Statistics from the nation’s official agency reveal a steady decline in matrimonial unions, with 1.58 million couples exchanging vows in 2023 – a staggering 128,000 fewer than the previous year. This downward trajectory has persisted since 2018, when a record 2.01 million marriages were recorded in the world’s fourth-most populous nation.
“With intense competition in the job market and skyrocketing housing costs, people need more time to prepare themselves financially and emotionally for the commitment of marriage and starting a family,” Renaldy explained, asserting his determination to wait until his mid-30s before taking the plunge.
While his parents eagerly anticipate his nuptials and the arrival of grandchildren, Renaldy remains steadfast in his decision to postpone marriage. His immediate plans involve pursuing a master’s degree in the Netherlands in 2024, a strategic move he hopes will bolster his career prospects.
The declining marriage rates in Indonesia are particularly noteworthy, as the country’s population continues to grow annually, prompting concerns from experts about shifting attitudes towards traditional matrimonial norms. Southeast Asia’s most populous nation recorded a population of 277.5 million in 2023, up from 267 million in 2018.
“Indonesia’s youth population has been on the rise, but the number of marriages nationwide has been declining,” observed Dede Oetomo, a sociologist and professor of gender studies at Airlangga University in Surabaya, East Java.
This trend poses a potential threat to Indonesia’s ambitious goal of achieving developed nation status by 2045, the centennial anniversary of its independence. The government aims to capitalise on the current demographic dividend – a period when the working-age population outnumbers those economically dependent – to avoid the middle-income trap, a challenge faced by many developing nations struggling to transition to a high-value economy.
“If we do not seize this opportunity, the demographic dividend will pass, and we will miss the chance to leverage it for the welfare of our people,” warned Hasto Wardoyo, the head of Indonesia’s family planning agency (BKKBN). “Our population must remain sufficiently high to avoid the middle-income trap.”
Compounding the issue further is the rising rate of divorces, with an estimated 500,000 couples parting ways annually, a significant increase from the 250,000 to 300,000 divorces recorded a decade ago, according to Wardoyo.
Sociologists attribute the declining marriage rates to a multitude of factors, including the growing individualistic mindset among Indonesians, who are increasingly prioritising personal goals over traditional societal norms and cultural expectations. The financial burdens associated with marriage and raising children are also cited as significant deterrents.
“A better-educated workforce and the economic pressures of marriage and parenthood are undoubtedly the most significant obstacles preventing Indonesian couples from tying the knot,” explained Jakarta-based sociologist Musni Umar.
While Indonesia has demonstrated resilience in its post-pandemic economic recovery, with an influx of foreign investment and robust export figures, these gains have not necessarily translated into widespread job opportunities on the ground. The nation’s overall unemployment rate stood at 5.3 percent in August 2023, one of the highest among its regional neighbours. Alarmingly, the youth unemployment rate, encompassing those aged 15 to 24, soared to a staggering 19.4 percent, according to official statistics.
“Economic factors play a pivotal role in this issue,” Umar remarked. “If the breadwinner loses his job and income, his wife is likely to leave him. And those struggling to find employment are hesitant to take on the responsibilities of marriage.”
Some observers criticise the Indonesian government’s premature withdrawal of Covid-19 incentives, hampering the country’s post-pandemic recovery efforts. While free technical training and seminars have been offered to those who lost their jobs during the pandemic, their impact on job creation remains uncertain.
For individuals like Renaldy, the financial implications of marriage extend beyond just the wedding ceremony. “If you get married, you have to move out of your parents’ house and establish a new home,” he explained, acknowledging the additional expenses he is not yet prepared to shoulder.
The once-popular belief of “just get married first, and we’ll face whatever comes next together” has faded significantly, according to Dr. Dede Oetomo. He notes that while multi-generational households were once common, the rise of nuclear families has placed the burden of securing affordable housing squarely on the shoulders of young couples.
And this challenge arises even before the consideration of children enters the equation. The decline in marriage rates is mirrored by the decline in Indonesia’s total fertility rate (TFR), which measures the average number of births per woman. In 2022, the TFR stood at 2.18, a notable drop from 2.48 in 2010, according to official statistics.
“It’s not that they hate children,” Dr. Dede clarified. “The younger generation is simply being practical and hesitant about starting a family without first ensuring they are financially ready for such long-term commitments.”
However, the reluctance to marry is not solely driven by financial constraints. Even among those who can afford to start a family, the allure of marriage has diminished, reflecting the influence of modern views and an increasing acceptance of individuals choosing to remain single or cohabitate without legal ties.
As more women enter the Indonesian workforce, their growing economic independence has also contributed to the decline in marriage rates. “Many females have worked hard to build successful careers, and they are reluctant to jeopardise their achievements by getting married,” Dr. Dede explained.
